Benny Hills - our "fastest in the west" milkman - is something of a legend. He does not just deliver milk to the fifty households on our estate - he delivers philosophy as well. "Are you going to stay with
Tractatus Logico-Philosophicus ?" (1921) he said to Ernie Flynn's mum at prefab number fifteen - "or is it time to switch to the less opaque and creamy
Blue Book (1933)?" You can always tell when Benny has been burning the midnight oil with
The Critique of Pure Reason (1781). What a racket his milk bottles make! The strain of combining milk delivery with logical positivism really got to him one Monday morning. He was seen gripping hold of the lapels of Swiley's jacket at prefab number twenty-five and shouting: "For pity's sake man, what exactly do you
mean when you say you want a
pint of
milk? If you don't start
defining your terms and
making your assumptions explicit you will be getting buggar all!" It was not for the cooling
David Hume ointment he periodically rubs into his forehead and various sensitive empirical parts his entire world-view would have been made redundant years ago.
As well as being adept at detecting new trends in philosophy the prefabs' milkman is something of an authority on new movements in architecture as well. On his very first round here he was singing the praises of "the noble Euclidian simplicity of the rectangular prefab." Nowadays he tells everyone that its straight-lined days are numbered. He tells us that on the other side of the Atlantic R. Buckminster Fuller is poised to persuade the Beech Aircraft Company to produce prefabs which are dome-shaped and circular.
He has seen the future and it is circular! R.Buckminster Fuller: "Man knows so much and does so little."Leaf through the pages of the
Burlington Magazine of Connoisseurs (the most coveted publication on our estate) and you can soon realise that the circling of the rectangle has become The Big Architectural Question Of The Day. To quote from the last editorial: "The conventional rectangular prefab is losing its classic
chic look - as any visitors to Twiverton will know." According to the followers of Buckminster Fuller the domed shaped prefab will lead to its demise." Neither Big Band Glenn Miller music or rectangular prefabs can stay fashionable for ever.
A shed is a building, a cathedral is architecture, but a prefab is design!"
posted by Ivor Morgan, The Prefab Files #
15:07
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